I didn’t finish tying up loose ends. I ran out of time. But I was able to let those threads lie. And left. I needed to get away. Let the jumble of the year fall away. Be still. Do nothing. There is no urgency. I forget I just make it up all year. I forget I can be still when needed. This time away is to remember.

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This month’s playlist:

Portrait of a Lady on Fire

There’s a moment that makes me gasp. A moment that crystallizes a visual motif and subverts a classical myth. And it broke me. I used to say Call Me by Your Name was the best romance I’d seen. It has been supplanted. This tragedy breaks the heart only to grow it larger.

Clariel

My favorite entry in the Old Kingdom series since Sabriel. The richness Nix adds to this world. Seeing the dawn of the kingdom’s decline. Learning yet another dimension to the magic of this land. A worthwhile prequel, surprisingly. And an excellently crafted tragedy.

Ghost of Yōtei

A beautiful evolution. They took the already polished Tsushima and made it gleam even brighter. The world is gorgeous--already resplendent in lush flora and now suffused with a perfusion of fauna. Flocks of cranes take flight as Atsu rides past on her steed, and herds of wild horses will gallop alongside. A duel to the death amidst a cloud of golden butterflies took my breath away. The combat is refined while also being more brutal, feral to match Atsu’s tragic character and her terrible path of revenge. It’s more Ghost of Tsushima, but better. Living up to the glowing memories I have of the first.

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This month, I have also been writing, here and there. Journaling and other things. I scanned a lot of developed film, which had been gathering dust around my apartment. And I had fun buying Christmas presents.